‘I Love My Husband But I Can’t Stop Thinking Of The Other Guy’


My name is Vanessa, and I’m a married woman. I met a man at the supermarket buying perfumes and he asked for my opinion and I gave him. We also chatted a bit about perfumes.

As I tried to pay for what I bought he asked for my number, I refused to give him, he begged me but I still refused. This man then brought out some money and his complementary card and put it in my bag and left my line and went to another line to pay and left.

I did not touch my bag I just paid with POS and drove home. It was when I got home that I checked my bag and saw that this man put N50,00 in my bag and his card.

I swear I have been thinking of this man, I have not been able to sleep.

I don’t know if I should I just tell my husband so we talk about it and laugh.

I don’t want to sleep with the man but I just want him as a friend because he is so nice nothing deep. Should I call him?

Hello Vanessa,
I would like to ask you a simple question: can you equate N50,000 and “deep” chats to the joy of marital bliss you experience? I guess your answer is as good as mine.
So, while it is good to have acquaintances with whom you can also discuss issues with and get a second opinion from on certain matters, the thought of having a secondary romantic relationship should not even occur at all.
Since the “friend” in question is male and you might not have had the chance to inform him that you are married, I think it’s better to inform your husband about the guy and his gifts. And that’s to douse any tension that may develop between you and your husband should you jam your friend again somewhere and he begins to act all loved up in public. At least, your husband will know that the guy is just a friend, nothing more.
Again, couples are supposed to be best of friends. This means that partners in a marriage are expected to know every detail of each other. Therefore, if you or your husband are hiding or withholding any information, especially when it relates to fidelity, it may hamper your marriage as you both will never trust each other. Trust, however, is a very critical component of marriage and could even be equated as the same level of love needed, according to experts.
So, inform your husband about the entire development. He could even provide you with tips on how to carefully manage interactions with your new friend. They could also turn out to be best of friends, which could be good for you. But never allow your thoughts for your friend ever lead you to go and play an away game outside.


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