My husband has refused to stop sleeping around. I’m tired of him. His promiscuity led us to relocate from a high brow area on the island to Ikorodu early this year. He had slept with our neighbour’s teenage daughter and also impregnated their maid. Fortunately for us, she lost the pregnancy.
Barely three weeks in our new apartment, my husband has started seeing a married woman down our street.
I got to know about his amorous affair with the said woman when her apprentice, who works as an errand girl for us, told me he had seen my husband with the woman in suspicious areas alone.
As if to confirm to me, my husband left his whatsapp message with the woman on his phone. Both of them have been having sex after a week we moved here.
I’m fed up.
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First of all, let me commiserate with you over your situation. It is never easy for any married person- be it male or female- to see and/or hear about their partner jumping around with another person and be delighted by such adultery.
I must commend you for staying steadfast in your marriage despite the unfaithfulness of your husband. Please, no matter the tons of comments or advice directed towards you, try as much as possible to remain and keep the marriage alive.
On how to resolve this unpalatable quagmire, I advice that you have an intimate discussion with your husband quickly and find out from him why he is always playing away games when you are at home. Approach him in a gentle manner so that he can talk and provide genuine and adequate responses to your questions.
Frame your questions in a way that he can reply on whether he is not satisfied with either of your sexual activity in the other room, your cooking, your mannerisms, house arrangement or any other thing. There must be a reason as to why he is doing such. Then extract a commitment from him that he would never committed act again, while you also remind him of how you love him after all these years.
But, if he fails to keep this commitment or even refuses to provide adequate responses to your questions, then I will advice that you involve both your husband’s parents and your own parents to mediate in a general family meeting. At least, he might be able to explain why he has become so promiscuous.
Hopefully, when the dust is eventually settled, inform the entire extended family that you would want your husband to formally commit his faithfulness to you by signing a document. Ensure that document is legally binding and is drafted by an experienced lawyer in family law. Your parents and in-laws might say it’s not necessary, but you must insist that he signs the documents.
This is important so as to safeguard the future of your marriage and also help keep your husband in check. Obviously, if he violates any terms of the agreement, the repercussions for him (as decided by you and your lawyer in the document) will be grave for him.
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