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‘I’m Suffering… My Wife Starves Me Of Sex When We Quarrel’



Hello Love and Life,

I have a question. Is it right for a woman to starve her husband of sex to punish him?

My wife is fond of this. Every time we have a little issue, she would refuse me sex for days. She has been doing this since I married her. Although I haven’t had any problem with this for years, it recently got me thinking. Why should I only get sex from my lawfully wedded wife when she’s happy with me?

If it was that she would open up for me immediately we settle our fight, it would have been better. I have to beg and buy her gifts before she yields. Sometimes, it is humiliating that I’m made to beg for sex.

Please, what can I do?


Hello Anonymous Writer,

Well, this is a subtle issue in which you also have to exercise your masculine power as well as your toasting ability, which you used to warm your way into your wife’s heart years back.

The truth of the matter is that she is playing hard to get. While she might feel emotionally drained by the quarrels, she wants you to fight and earn your spot with her in “the other room”. Therefore, you also have to be a “baby boy” instead of depicting yourself as always being desperate for sex. That’s the only way you can get to her and she will cease all her shakara.

So, I will advise that you can deploy any of the following measures. The first one is that if you demand for sex after an altercation and she refuses to “give it to you”, leave her and do not make such demand for a week (From personal experience, I know sey body no be firewood but just try. Also, no go play “away game” ooo). Just conduct your normal activities in the house, greet her well as usual but do not demand sex or buy her any gift item. She will be shocked when you do that for a week and she will be the one running back into your arms apologising and demanding instead that you satisfy her.

Another option is that if your wife refuses to yield to your sexual demands at the first time of asking, continue to tease her about how she’s denying you your conjugal rights. Just keep on pulling her legs on the impact of what she’s doing to you emotionally. Then, you purchase a gift item which you know she really likes or desires. Once you offer to give it to her she will obviously get delirious, but then announce the breaking news to her. Tell her you would not give her the gift as “punishment” for depriving you of your time with her in bed. She will apologise profusely and beg that you forgive and hand over the item to her. Then, make your own demand in a calm and romantic manner: that she must henceforth stop her act or she would not get goodies from you again. I’m sure you know what her response would be.

So, just use any of the two instances mentioned and you have your leverage to control your woman as you want in bed.



Need Love & Life Guru’s advice? Send your mails to loveandlifeguru01@gmail.com and help is sure to come your way. 

About Gabriel Ntoka

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