Hello Love & Life.
My name is Milicent and I just finished my National Youth Service scheme in Lagos State. I was posted down south from the east. I had accommodation challenges so I stayed with a cousin for a while. She started showing that I was a pest, so i left.
I came across a vacant self-contained apartment, which I couldn’t afford to pay all at the time. I liased with the landlord about when I’ll pay the outstanding.
He was a good-looking young man. I didn’t know he has wives and children in another apartment elsewhere.
One day, he invited me to a party at his apartment on the top floor and, that was all I knew.
I got pregnant and when I confronted him, he was excited about it. He said I was carrying his 18th child, and would be the first graduate to carry his child.
My life is ruined, what can I do?
Let me, first of all, sympathise with you over your unfortunate situation. No lady deserves to be manipulated into motherhood if she is not ready.
The most likely scenario was that either your food or drink was spiked, and that is why you have little or no knowledge about what happened.
I disagree with your statement about your life being ruined as a result of your pregnancy. Instead, you can use the birth of your unborn child and the experiences gathered from this nasty incident as a springboard to excel in life. Remember some of the prominent ladies we celebrate in the arts and other areas of endeavour in Nigeria and their story? Some also experienced unsavoury encounters just as you have and, instead of being demoralised, have gone on to be shinning stars in life. So, I will advice that you do not see this setback as the climax of your life. No! Prepare to excel in life instead.
However, I will advise that you prepare to be a single mother. I am not sure you want to get married to the father of the child, and that you would want to nurse and train your child in your own way. Also prepare for custody battles, which the child’s father may likely be continuously engaged in. However, the law should work in your favour as a teenage child is not expected to be taken away from the mother until he or she reaches a certain age.
You might also want to report the father of the child to the Office of the Public Defender (OPD) in Lagos State since the unconsented sexual activity occurred in Lagos State. The agency will definitely be interested in a case like yours and will likely provide legal representation, and also involve the relevant law enforcement agencies. In that way, you could secure an injuction which bars your child’s father from coming close to him, if that is your wish.
So brace up, Milicent. You have the whole world waiting for you to fulfil your potential as a mum and professional. No temporary setback should prevent you from utilising the enormous opportunities out there.
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